The Art of Neighboring: Building Genuine Relationships Right Outside Your Door
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What if Jesus meant that we should love our actual neighbors? When Jesus was asked to sum up everything into one command, he said to love God with everything we have and to love our neighbors as ourselves. Most of us have turned this simple idea of loving our neighbors into a nice saying, putting it on bumper stickers and refrigerator magnets and then going on with our lives without actually putting it into practice. What would happen if every follower of Jesus took the Great Commandment literally? Is it possible that the solution to our society's biggest issues has been right under our noses for the past two thousand years? In The Art of Neighboring, Jay Pathak and Dave Runyon show you how to ● create genuine friendships with the people who live in closest proximity to you ● overcome the barriers that keep you from getting to know your neighbors ● make small steps and give from what you have to make a difference ● commit to good neighboring as a lifestyle Includes a study guide with questions on each chapter, making this book perfect for small groups or individual study. Read more
Publisher : Baker Books; 48081st edition (August 1, 2012)
Language : English
Paperback : 208 pages
ISBN-10 : 080101459X
ISBN-13 : 98
Item Weight : 2.31 pounds
Dimensions : 5.5 x 0.52 x 8.5 inches
Best Sellers Rank: #47,358 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #95 in Evangelism #272 in Christian Family & Relationships #1,363 in Christian Spiritual Growth (Books)
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#272 in Christian Family & Relationships:
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Top Amazon Reviews
Highly recommended for those looking to make a difference in their community and live the great commandment (love god and love people). I was eager to read this book. I became familiar with Jay Pathak recently through his church podcast, and I'd seen this book mentioned in several other books and websites. The book has one central idea: be intentional in getting to know your neighbors and build friendships with them. That's it. Take Jesus' words literally to love your neighbor. The christian reader will expect the book to then tell you how to evangelize your neighbors. But it doesn't. That's not the point of neighboring. The idea is that God calls us to love and serve others, regardless of whether they are seeking Him or not. Don't make your neighbors a project. Just be a normal friend. It is likely that, if you are a good friend, they will notice that some things in your life are different. And maybe they'll ask you why. But maybe they won't :), and that's fine. About half of the book is spent on building the case for neighboring and how to do it. There are a lot of good practical examples given through first person story accounts. The second half of the book is more about how to be a friend and how to relate socially to people in a natural, normal way. I found this material to be very "common sense" stuff and kind of humorous, but I suppose there are many people who just aren't good at relationships. Some of the topics covered in these chapters are humility, listening skills, forgiveness, and boundaries. I think this book would be a great primer for someone who just doesn't know how to relate to other people well. Overall, I highly recommend this book. I plan on being more intentional with my neighborhood. Hint: Start with finding out your neighbor's names :)
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Reviewed in the United States on December 15, 2013 by nookhorton
Point: Until we recognize that “neighbor” in the second greatest command in Scripture can actually mean “someone living next to us,” we will fail to see our responsibility to those God has placed in our lives to love. Path: The authors outline their reasoning, support, and application of actually loving one’s neighbor in the North American context. They tell their story, share illustrations from others, and give a vision for cities with loving neighbors. Their specific application is woven throughout the book. Sources: There are references throughout to popular authors of today, both religious and secular. Agreement: I appreciated the challenge. How easy is it for me to generalize “neighbor” to everyone, and miss the individual right next door. It was very convicting to see what was, and at the same time, exciting to see what could be. Disagreement: There are a couple disagreements that I have, but neither of them are reason enough not to read and implement this book. They are coming from a broader ecclesiastical background which is fine, except that in their generalities their application suffers. Specifically, there is little emphasis on the local church since there is one universal church. Without a focus on the local church we run the same risk as generalizing the 2nd command - if it means everyone we miss the individual. If we are not able to connect our neighbor with a local church, they will be lost in the universal. While I appreciate their intentional distinction between “ulterior versus ultimate” motives, I think they could have been more specific about how can I best love my neighbor? By pointing them to Jesus through my life, my relationship with them, and my specific gospel conversation. I think at this point, if one pairs this book with “Evangelism” by Stiles and “A Praying Life” by Miller, they will get a more well-rounded picture. Personal App: Am I loving my neighbor specifically? Do I know my neighbor? Favorite Quote: “Our tendency is to put ourselves in positions of power—in this case, always being the one to give. We want to be seen as the capable one with all the resources and answers. But being in a relationship where we allow others to meet our needs is always a good thing. The art of neighboring involves our being able both to give of our time and energy and, just as important, to receive from others.” It would be worth another read and I would recommend it to someone who: Is interested in obeying the Great Commandment Is looking for good ideas about how to love their neighbor Other books along this theme would be: Coleman, Robert E. The Master Plan of Evangelism. Revell, 2006. Dever, Mark. The Gospel and Personal Evangelism. First Edition. Crossway, 2007. Stiles, J. Mack. Evangelism: How the Whole Church Speaks of Jesus. Crossway, 2014.
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Reviewed in the United States on January 20, 2016 by S. Grotzke
Many years ago I preached my Grandpa Foster's funeral. While it was a very difficult thing to do, I was blessed. The order of service for the funeral was unusual. It read, "Services for Robert Lee Foster ... Service performed by Robert Lee Foster." While preaching the service, I was very nervous and in mourning. I had a very difficult time holding it together but I am called of God and my grandmother asked me to preach the service. I wanted to say "no" but I am glad that I didn't because I would have missed a huge blessing. A blessing that continues to bless me today. As people where leaving the service, I received many kind words from my family. Many of my grandparent's neighbors and friends who were in attendance that day also shared words of sympathy with me. I started to notice a theme in their comments about my grandfather. They kept telling me about various things that my grandfather had done for them and how much they appreciated my grandfather. Many of them said, "He was a good neighbor." My grandfather lived his more than ninety years in rural Kansas. He worked on oil rigs into his seventies. He also served the local community church as a lay minister. I am biased (and one of his namesakes) because he is my grandpa. I knew that he was great! But to stand at his funeral and hear the community express their gratitude for his "neighborliness" was a true blessing. I learned something that day: being a good neighbor matters. A few months back one of my friends stumbled on a recent publication: Jay Pathak and David Runyon, The Art of Neighboring (Grand Rapids: Baker, 2012). The title struck a cord with me and I thought that I should read that book. A few weeks went by and then it was offered as a free daily deal on Kindle so I downloaded it. I finished reading it last week and I am impressed. The basic narrative of the book is a story about a church in Colorado that is trying to find a way to serve their community. They decided to live out the Second Greatest Commandment, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Mark 12:31), not generically but specifically. Consistently though out the book, they remind us, "The problem is...that when we aim for everything, we hit nothing. So when we insist we're neighbors with everybody, often we end up being neighbors with nobody" (page 35; Kindle, location 382). The whole book is good, practical advice about how to build a network of people in your neighborhood to care for the needs around you. Themes of friendship, compassion, forgiveness, and reconciliation are woven throughout the book. Chapter eleven, "The Art of Forgiving" is a must read for solid, practical advice on "When Neighbors are Enemies...What do you do when you have a neighbor you can't seem to get along with?" (page 156; Kindle, location 1695). [As far as I know, I am currently at peace with my neighbors.] Many of us would say, "I am too busy to add anything else to my life." And indeed, we are a busy culture. One of the admonitions that they gave to reorient our priorities was "be interruptible." "The idea of being interruptable is being willing to be inconvenienced. It means developing a mind-set that accepts the interruptions of others" (page 55; Kindle, location 602). This is one area where I desperately need to improve, with my neighbors, my family, my friends, my students...you get the picture! You should also check out their website, artofneighboring.com, but it will make more sense once you have read the book. The website includes many excellent resources for living out the teachings in the book. Including: - a pdf copy of the block map talked about in the book - how to start a movement guides for both civic and church leaders - how to cast a vision for your city - a block party kit - and a host of other digital resources! The book is a good book. I hope that you will read it for yourself and think about how you might become an intentional good neighbor. "Start now, by doing the small things well, and commit to good neighboring as a lifestyle. You have been invited to begin a sacred journey, one that has the potential to change your block, your city, and possibly the world" (page 184; Kindle. location 2014). My grandpa had that figured out and his neighbors gave witness. Will yours? Will mine?
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Reviewed in the United States on February 13, 2013 by Robert L. Foster