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Paddle Your Own Canoe: One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living

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Description

Parks and Recreation actor Nick Offerman shares his humorous fulminations on life, manliness, meat, and much more in his first book. Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman—who better to deliver this tutelage than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation’s Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in woodworking—he runs his own woodshop—Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman’s childhood in small-town Minooka, Illinois—“I grew up literally in the middle of a cornfield”—to his theater days in Chicago, beginnings as a carpenter/actor and the hilarious and magnificent seduction of his now-wife Megan Mullally. It also offers hard- bitten battle strategies in the arenas of manliness, love, style, religion, woodworking, and outdoor recreation, among many other savory entrees. A mix of amusing anecdotes, opinionated lessons and rants, sprinkled with offbeat gaiety, Paddle Your Own Canoe will not only tickle readers pink but may also rouse them to put down their smart phones, study a few sycamore leaves, and maybe even hand craft (and paddle) their own canoes. Read more

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Top Amazon Reviews


  • Kindred spirits
Format: Kindle
My first thoughts as I began reading Nick's book (I call him Nick. He's my TV boyfriend, deal.) was SOULMATE!!!! I mean, here's a man who both is and is not Ron freakin' Swanson, making him the best of both worlds, in my opinion. And he has manly facial hair which... okay, I don't really like moustaches, but it is manly. Also, he's originally from Chicago. Yes he is, he's from Minooka IL, which as you should know is Chicago by default because it's north of Kankakee. Technically Chicago is bounded by Kankakee in the south, Lake Geneva in the north, and the Mississippi in the west. And there's a bigass lake to the east which is ours too. This is not my fault, I didn't make the rules. Then I calmed down and admitted that Nick might not be my soulmate because he seems to have found one in Megan Mullally, a perfectly hilarious woman to whom I willingly relinquish any soulmate claims on Nick. Instead, I believe him to be a kindred spirit. He's smart, he's funny, and he doesn't give a damn what people think of him. I like his politics, I like his attitudes, and I like his style. If that's not a kindred spirit, I don't know what is. I've seen reviewers complain that this book is anti-religion, and I'm here to tell you it's not, not at all. Offerman (I just put my reviewer cap on over my fangirl cap, so now I'm being all review-y.) says upfront that religion is a good thing when you keep it in your church, your family, your heart. When you try to put it into your government, when you try to use it to define your society, that's his line in the sand. (Mine too.) That doesn't make him anti-religion, that makes him anti-authoritarian and anti-jerk, which in my book is a good thing. I've seen reviewers complain that this book is profane. I resist the word in this context because of its Puritan-level prissiness. Offerman's language is bawdy in the best sense of the word; a big, Falstaffian lot of cussin' and good, honest sexual innuendo, neither of which will kill, maim, or otherwise do jack to another human being. Or to put it into perspective, he's not shooting people, is he? So calm the hell down. What he is doing in this wonderful, hilarious book, is telling the story of his life, crediting his family, particularly his parents, his friends, and his wife with making him as good a man as he is able to be, which seems pretty darn good to me. From his origins in Minooka, to his college years in Champaign-Urbana, to theater in Chicago, and then to film and television in Los Angeles, Offerman gives us not only his own story, but an insight into how a working actor becomes a working actor. In his case it involves high production values, and a good bit of weed. One of my favorite stories is how he developed a running joke about proposing to Mullally, first by accident, then as a series of practical jokes, and finally for real. Their romance warmed the heart of an old cynic like myself, and made me laugh. I don't really know if you'll love this book the way I do. I hope so. I hope you will love it and leave a message saying, "We must be kindred spirits." Because there's nothing better in the world. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on September 18, 2017 by MJ Walters

  • Review if you are a Ron Swanson/Parks and Rec Fan
Format: Hardcover
Here the situation. If you like Ron Swanson. Don't get this book. This is not "Parks and Rec: The novel". This is an autobiography. I think 90% of the complaints are from people who expected this book to be an extension of Ron Swanson character - talking about eating lots of meat and complaining about Tammy 2. Instead, they got a book about an actors rather ideal life in middle America, his entry into the theater world and his struggle to finding acting jobs in LA. The books is however, HILARIOUS. Nick talks about his life in a very open and honest manner, going over both mistakes and victories. He is middle of the line political person, but also has strong views and yes, a pretty libertarian stance. He pulls no punches making fun of folks who are dependant on technology - since ALOT of folks are depenant, I'm sure many of the complaints here are from folks who were likely irked by his constant ribbing of folks who can't line with Instagram, a GPS and would die with two hours if left alone in the wilderness. If your an open-minded person (which most people are not) then this is a VERY helpful book. He has alot of earthy advice on everything from drug use, to dating, to sex, to eating right, work ethic, etc. NICK OFFERMAN IS NOT RON SWANSON. Nor does he claim to be. Ron Swanson is an over-the-top version of Nick Offerman, written by writers who knew Nick. Nick Offerman does enjoy fishing, immensely. He doesn't not perfer hunting, tho understands many do. Nick Offerman eat's salad and veggies, but won't turn away a nice steak. Nick Offerman likes to hit the bong and watch Twin Peaks, as opposed to Ron Swanson who would mostly be found carving 1/110th 18th Century Spanish Gallon from a fallen tree near his cabin with nothing but a pen knife. He does not even mention Ron Swanson until the very last chapter. If you are a hardcore, totalitarian conservative, Nick will probably say something to irk you. If you are a hardcore, bleeding liberal Nick will probably say something to irk you. He's not doing it on purpose - he's just in the middle of the political spectrum and is making his views clear, usually with some humor attached. IF you are Ron Swanson/Parks and Rec fan you need to do this: Before you buy this book, then scream to high heaven and post a nasty review of it because it doesn't have things like "Ron Swanson's chart of needs" - think for a second. Look up Nick Offerman. Yes. N-I-C-K O-F-F-E-R-M-AN. Watch an interview with him on Conan O'Brien or something on Youtube. Realize that this is a person's autobiography and not a joke book. Then once you do that, then you can ease into the tranquil warmth of what is Nick Offerman's sage-like advice and story telling. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on October 30, 2015 by Daniel Mooney

  • ... a book written within the persona of Nick Offerman’s best character, Ron Swanson
Format: Paperback
Paddle Your Own Canoe When I bought this book I expected a book written within the persona of Nick Offerman’s best character, Ron Swanson. In a bittersweet turnout that wasn't what I received. Instead, Paddle Your Own Canoe is more of a biography of Nick Offerman that spans from his upbringing all the way to present day. It was a small disappointment when I I realized I wasn't going to be reading a book written like his character. But, this disappointment was quickly turned into enjoyment with hearing about how this great actor came to be. In fact I found it rather interesting that he got his start in theater and had one of the hardest times breaking into a movie or television role. Offerman does a fantastic job of injecting some comedy and dirty humor into what some could see as just another biography about a persons rise to stardom. Throughout the book he references those people who helped him get to the position he's at today, not the least of which was his wife, Megan Mullally. It wasn't the read I expected but I was very pleased with what I received instead. There is a portion of this book where he speaks rather abrasively about religion, which for some can be hard to swallow at times. This book makes up for its abrasiveness by injecting comedy, tips on how to live, and real life stories that can make anyone laugh. It was a bittersweet surprise I didn't expect out of the man that portrays the manliest man on the face of this earth to date. But as stated before if you know your buying a book by Nick Offerman and not Ron Swanson you will throughly enjoy this guide for delicious living. I would recommend this book to a more mature audience, this is due to the topic manor of this book, which can span anywhere from family to sex and even drugs. Even though the topic manor can reach this rather large span it still remains true to being a biography/guide. Nick Offerman pours himself into this book, good and bad. He shows that even through adversity if you remain true to yourself, give life the time to work it out and get a hearty helping of good luck you can achieve anything you set out to do. I would also recommend the audiobook to those who are big fans of Nick Offerman mainly because he is the one who reads the book. Hearing about his life and experiences through his voice and tone make the book just that much more engulfing. Due to the enjoyment I got out of this book I fully intend to purchase his other book, Gumption: Relighting the Torch of Freedom with America’s Gutsiest Troublemakers, which in-tales Offerman talking about twenty one of his national heroes who date back to George Washington all the way up to Willie Nelson. In this book he has a lot of the same topics that he discusses in this Paddle Your Own Canoe such as; politics, woodworking, religion, and of course meat. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on February 12, 2016 by Lorie C.

  • DELICIOUSness! Inspiring memoir!
Format: Hardcover
“Paddle Your Own Canoe” written by Nick Offerman After watching at least one episode of the comical television series “Parks and Recreation” (thus a chance to familiarize yourself with the masculine, carnivorous, neoliberal, and mustachioed Ron Swanson character—played by Nick Offerman) you may then want to read Offerman's memoir "Paddle Your Own Canoe." Offerman is a loveable humanist who encourages others to live a “delicious life” that entails getting out into the great outdoors, creating something with your very own hands, and best of all finding a partner to share and enjoy life’s adventures with. No doubt his book will appeal to those who love his Ron Swanson character’s deadpan humor as he delivers his personal history related to sex, drugs, rock and roll, theatre, and film—and to small town America. He hails from Minooka, Illinois, attended U of I in Champaign-Urbana, and is a well known professional in the Chicago theatre scene. Offerman is a wordsmith. By the time you finish his book, you’ll be ready to take the Graduate Records Exam (GRE) and pass it with flying colors, so long as you do your homework and look up the words he cherry picked to vividly describe his childhood, his years as a not so starving (yet very poor) artist, and his current status as “one lucky bastard” (his expletives are common knowledge, so no need to have a dictionary on hand for this half of his book). I would especially recommend this book to anyone who is the least bit interested in the life of a modern day thespian. Offerman has had an extensive, successful career in theatre and in front of the camera. He offers sage wisdom in a very direct, endearing, and humble manner. He is a family man to the core, a loyal friend, and one of the funniest individuals on television today. As a woodcraftsman, he is a force to be reckoned with. And to boot—he is an intelligent and engaging author. This is one of my top picks for the 2013 year of great reads! It is also enjoyable to read a local author. Check out this author’s website at: [...] Also, check out an entertaining video trailer introducing Offerman’s book: [...] Tags: Nonfiction; Memoir; Humor --Jeanne ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on December 31, 2013 by Jeanne

  • Subtle balance and self-aware - This is Nick Offerman, not Ron Swanson
Format: Audiobook
I am not the biggest fan of Parks and Recreation. As a huge fan of The Office, it seemed like a cheap imitation or spinoff with the intention of producing more money for the studios involved. However, like many, the redeeming quality was summed up in two words: Ron Swanson (and Aziz Ansari and Aubrey Plaza and Chris Pratt. Still not the greatest show, but some of the best sitcom characters ever written...) Long story short, I am still not the biggest fan of Parks and Recreation, but began to learn more about Nick Offerman (reads tweets from young female celebrities anyone?). This book is pretty awesome and from the reviews I have read, many people are missing the subtleties. So I will enlighten you all. Nick Offerman's story is interesting, but not incredible. It would not even stand alone as a book. What is interesting about Nick Offerman is the unique wisdom he has gained from growing up in the rural midwest, time spent as an aspiring thespian in Chicago, and finally pursuing (and achieving) theatrical success in Hollywood. So he has broken up the book thusly: he alternates every chapter detailing his life story with a chapter postulating on his personal perspective on a pertinent peeve or philosophy he possesses. The humor and wisdom both come from his ability to step back from his unique career to pull themes and values from all that he has seen, done, and learned. He is a loquacious wordsmith who juxtaposes "Schadenfreude" with "postcoital Scotch egg." Funny, dry, and profound, I ate it up in two days because of the beautiful balance between his humor and his down to earth philosophical depth. A wonderful book that I intend to read again soon. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on November 24, 2013 by JakeR

  • Should have checked it out in the book
Format: Hardcover
My only knowledge of Nick Offerman was having seen him in the Kings of Summer and I really liked his performance. I guess I expected it to be a funny take on life from a man's man. And, it was one part that. It was also one part his biography (which I did not expect) from his humble theater beginnings to the star on his own sitcom.I give the book 3 stars because: 1. To use a boating pun, Mr. Offerman goes a bit overboard on his love for his wife and it gets very annoying after a while. Consider the audience when you write; what point is there to going on and on about your wife, her various sexy bits, etc. to a bunch of strangers? It might be funny at times, but pretty pointless otherwise. 2. He really doesn't get too deep into why things like the outdoors and woodworking are so important to him. At least I didn't take away anything that stuck with me. As a fellow woodworker, I would have liked to hear more about that side of him, but it was mostly reserved for one small chapter. 3. He has poodles. Yes, poodles; the most unmanly creature to walk this earth (okay, maybe they get points for being larger dogs, but poodles!) 4. Half of the book is about his various stage and screen projects, casting calls, meeting various stars, and so on which I found pretty pretty boring. I guess if I were following that path in my own life it might have been more interesting. But, then I probably would have likely read a biography of a bit more seasoned actor or actress. 5. Poodles. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2014 by james

  • fun and sawdust...
Format: Paperback
Like most people, I was first introduced to Nick Offerman through his Parks & Rec character Ron Swanson. Over time, I learned more about the actor through different television interviews and hilarious internet videos. Before I read this book, I knew only a few things about Offerman. Mostly, I knew he was an actor, married to an actress, and that we was a proud woodworker. I find entertainers with unrelated passions very intriguing. It’s not everyday you see someone passionate about the fine arts covered in sawdust. If you think Ron Swanson is your soulmate, then you would probably hate Nick Offerman. Yes, Offerman and Swanson do share an affinity towards red meat, working with your hands, and being out in nature, but there are more differences than similarities. Offerman is definitely a great humorist and entity unto himself. I liked this book. His comments and his opinions keep the book moving. His stories about his Chicago acting days were interesting but kind of boring to me, but then again, I don’t really care about the acting scene in Chicago. We have differing worldviews on some subjects, but, that is okay. I can disagree with somethings and still find the book great. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2018 by Reid McCormick

  • Funny, but sometimes long winded
Format: Hardcover
We are HUGE fans of Nick Offerman, and we especially love his Parks and Recreation charcter, Ron Swanson. So, when I saw this book, I figured why not? Could be funny. And it was! So many parts of this book I laughed out loud (his over appreciation for his wife's breasts for instance!) and that's saying something for me. And there are many parts of this book that are actually touching, again his appreciate for his wife, breasts and all. Offerman is open and honest about his ignorant years-teens, early 20's-and that is somewhat refreshing to read from a celebrity. He makes no apologies for his actions, but rather he recounts his missteps and offers his own brand of warning to young readers. But then, he could be a bit long winded, and perhaps a tad preachy when it came to certain topics. The Government for instance, that being said I didn't find anything he wrote offensive in any way. One nice thing here is that it's very easy to skip the parts you aren't interested in/dont' like. You won't feel lost when picking up the next chapter, so you aren't forced to read something trivial to further understand the story (for the record, I did read the whole book, but you do not HAVE too). If you're a fan, pick it up, I think you'll have a few chuckles. If you read it while eating a large steak and downing an ice cold beer-even better. ... show more
Reviewed in the United States on March 11, 2014 by Xina143

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