The Heroin Diaries: Ten Year Anniversary Edition: A Year in the Life of a Shattered Rock Star
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The shocking, gripping, and at times darkly hilarious bestselling memoir of Nikki Sixx’s yearlong war with a vicious heroin addiction, featuring exclusive new content. When Mötley Crüe was at the height of its fame, there wasn’t any drug Nikki Sixx wouldn’t do. He spent days—sometimes alone, sometimes with other addicts, friends, and lovers—in a coke- and heroin-fueled daze. The highs were high, and Nikki's journal entries reveal some euphoria and joy. But the lows were lower, often ending with Nikki in his closet, surrounded by drug paraphernalia and wrapped in paranoid delusions. Here, Nikki shares the diary entries—some poetic, some scatterbrained, some bizarre—of those dark times. Joining him are Tommy Lee, Vince Neil, Mick Mars, Slash, Rick Nielsen, Bob Rock, and a host of ex-managers, ex-lovers, and more. Brutally honest, utterly riveting, and surprisingly moving, The Heroin Diaries follows Nikki during the year he plunged to rock bottom—and his courageous decision to pick himself up and start living again. Read more
Publisher : MTV Books; Anniversary edition (October 24, 2017)
Language : English
Paperback : 512 pages
ISBN-10 : 1501187546
ISBN-13 : 44
Item Weight : 1.55 pounds
Dimensions : 6.13 x 1 x 8 inches
Best Sellers Rank: #34,352 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #65 in Rock Music (Books) #74 in Rock Band Biographies #1,154 in Memoirs (Books)
#65 in Rock Music (Books):
#74 in Rock Band Biographies:
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Top Amazon Reviews
In 1987 Motley Crue recorded Girls, Girls, Girls, toured with the then unknown Guns 'n Roses, sold out shows around the country (and world) and partied like they always had a day left to live. The previous book to tell the tale of this excess, The Dirt, felt more like a glorification of the excesses of the band, even though it addressed all the drug abuse Nikki Sixx subjected himself to, subsequent overdoses that almost killed him and reemergence towards a cleaner lifestyle. Basically, you take those chapters of The Dirt and make them their own book and you have The Heroin Diaries. The book is set up like a diary. In fact, it is a diary: the book accounts the year (Christmas 1986 to Christmas 1987) that Nikki spiraled down a deep hole of addiction and depression and kept insanely careful track of it in a notebook. In addition to his entries (cleaned up a bit so we can understand them), Nikki includes commentary from himself as well as those who were close to him at the time (it's clear that a lot of care and work was undertaken to get all of these voices lined up to tell this story). I'm reminded of one entry where Nikki says in passing that he had a blast at a radio interview the other night, but probably got the DJ fired. The commentary afterwards is the DJ's account of the debauchery that went down that night (and, yes, he did indeed get fired). Nikki doesn't pull any punches and asked all of his contributors to do the same. They are brutally honest and help paint a magnificent picture of what it is like to find yourself on a speeding train charging forward into a brick wall. If you ever wanted to know what the rock and roll lifestyle was like, or what it feels like to be addicted to drugs, this is the memoir for you. It's actually amazing to me that there could possibly have been any lucid entries. We assume of course that a number of them were cleaned up by the editor, but there are times when you are stunned at Sixx's foresight into the future of the industry (the eventual downfall of the hair metal genre by the flood of copycat bands), the future of the band (that they'd make their next record a #1 album) and even his own dim foreboding of the consequences of his lifestyle. He talks to the diary as if it were a person, as if it were his wife and only confidant in the world during that year (and it probably was). He addresses it with things like, "I have to go to the show now, but I'll see you when I get back tonight." When he departs without an entry for several days (sometimes simply because he is sober and sane) he is always apologetic and makes jokes about how he only writes to it when he is on drugs. The book pages are broken up with scribblings, notes that presumably came out of the original dairy (To Do lists, lost lyric ideas, notes and the like), drug abuse inspired art and photographs of the people and places addressed, as well as song lyrics from a whole career of Sixx's songwriting. There are Motley Crue songs, songs from his 58 solo album, and songs from bands Nikki has adored in his life and reflect his lifestyle then and now. Each chapter is a month in the year, with an introduction, intermission and afterward included to set us up, take a break to reflect and plow forward into the future. The afterward in particular is interesting, because in it Sixx explains what happened in his life after that year: getting on and off the drugs, his failed marriages, his struggling band, his solo projects; everything (he calls it his Life After Death). It goes up to and beyond everything covered in The Dirt, and answers a number of niggling questions leftover from that book, like what was going on during the Girls Tour, what did some of the people mentioned in that book think about things discussed (Slash talking about his interactions with Nikki back then and his own struggling band and drug addictions), or whatever had become of certain events (like all that drama with Vanity). I found myself taking the ups (yes, there were good days) and downs along with Nikki on his ride of drug use, paranoia, rage, attempts at detox, thrills and pitfalls of touring, women, joys of songwriting and love of music, falling off the wagon, struggling on, wondering if he was killing himself, hoping for a way out, dying and coming back to life. I found myself reading an entry, wondering a question about it, and having it answered by the commentary. I also found myself wondering if the now clean and sober Vanity, turned Evangelist, is really any less insane than she was back then. Sure the drugs are gone, but the woman seems like she has a few permanent screws loose (there's one entry where she rambles on about the devil, leaving you thinking, "huh?," and then there's Nikki's commentary under hers going "Huh?" as well: fantastic!). The book has a message and Nikki Sixx has a hope that by writing this, that by laying his weaknesses bare for the world to see, that maybe that message can get through to people: the tunnel is dark but there is a light at the end, and even though it's probably better if you don't get into that tunnel in the first place, just because you are there doesn't mean there is no hope for you. I'm definitely sold on this book, as I was already sold on the sountrack weeks ago. I highly recommend it to fans of the band, fans of rock and roll, people interested in learning about the dangers of excess and any open-minded and curious individuals in general. It's a good read all around.
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Reviewed in the United States on September 12, 2007 by T. LaPonte
Nikki Sixx sharing the most vulnerable moments of his addiction and struggles with mental health. I believe this is such an important read, and gives you and insight to the mind of someone struggling with so many battles. This is a MUST read!!
Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2024 by cassidy
Juicy stuff.
Reviewed in the United States on October 15, 2024 by Lu Ann
An Amazing Book!!! Nikki Sixx bares his soul in this Diary. Nikki exposes the devastating toll that his drug and alcohol addictions take on his life and those around him. This book is filled with very graphic depictions of the life of a Rock Star who has it all and hits rock-bottom with his Heroin addiction and severe depression. There are many reviewers who have criticized how sincere Nikki Sixx is in releasing this book and I have to wonder why they are being so hard on Nikki. Releasing this book is a very courageous move on the part of this very famous and talented man. Nikki Sixx could very well have kept all these horror stories to himself but instead he hopes that his story can hopefully help others. In his Introduction he makes it clear why he has written this book. "So why have I decided to publish these insane diaries and show the world just what a f*****-up, strung-out madman I was at the height of my success? Well, it's simple. If one person reads this book and doesn't have to go down the same road as me, it was worth sharing my personal hell with them. I'm also donating profits from this book to help runaway kids at a charity I set up called Running Wild in the Night through Covenant House.... They say to keep what you have, you have to give it away. I believe that.... If life is what you make it, I've made mine great. It took a lot of hard work and if you need to, you can do it too." Nikki Sixx demonstrates his sincere desire to stay in recovery from his addictions; one of the surest ways to help stay on track is to reach out to others and try to help them avoid the route he took. By writing this book to help others Nikki is able to help himself stay strong and stay drug-free. As a celebrity he is able to reach out to so many people and he is using his position and influence in a positive way. It is wonderful that the profits from this book are donated to his charity Running Wild in the Night with Covenant House to help runaway kids! This book is filled with hope and inspiration and can be useful to anyone who is going through a hard time and thinks things will never get better. I highly recommend this book and the Soundtrack of the Heroin Diaries to any Motley Crue fan! Thumbs up to Nikki Sixx for being brave enough to expose his weakness in the hopes of helping others. May Nikki Sixx continue to remain sober, drug-free and free from the burdon of depression.
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Reviewed in the United States on March 19, 2008 by Luv Watching Movies